Tuesday, October 16, 2012

I Heard it Through the Grapevine

Okay, the funniest thing to me about this conference was the number of people
who recognized me...because of my HAIR!
Plug socket look, folks. It works-for recognition purposes.
I was rather shocked and somewhat dismayed when I recently heard through the grapevine that some people are intimidated by me.

You know, "because I have it all together..."

Did you just hear my very loud, and very unladylike snort?

I may be a very disciplined person. I may run and swim. I may home school, cook and clean. I DO NOT HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER!!!

Shall I repeat that? Or bold it? And italicize it?

I DO NOT HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER!!!  (I threw in some underlining for emphasis)


Ladies (and gents, if you are reading), readers, Friends...if the message you are getting from Barefoot Hippie Girl is that I have it all together, I am not fulfilling my mission.

My mission is to motivate and challenge. It is to point you to the Lord. It is to encourage you in your walk.

But, when you think that I am infallible and all perfectly put together, that isn't encouraging-that is downright annoying. I know it is.

Here is a few things I learned this weekend...

A good measure for a teacher is to ask her students what they hear her saying. By having them repeat it back, you find out what they are hearing. You find out if they are getting it. If grapevine feedback from my blog is that I have it all together, I'm not presenting what I mean to. And I'm sorry.

Share from your brokenness. And let Jesus come out louder than me. His glory through my major cracks.

It is a lot harder to share your story than your opinion. When I really lay my heart on the line, I want you to know how I've gotten to where I am.

Listen to what makes me cry. These are the things that move me. This is where my heart beats strongest. Share from those depths.

I can't say that I will be blogging radically differently. I blog where my life is. I hope you get that. I am not perfect. My kids are not perfect. My life is not perfect. My marriage is not perfect.

I am working to find the middle spot of vulnerability and protecting the ones I love.

I want to convey that I am a work in progress-because I am! That is what I want you to hear. The things I write are the things God is teaching me. How He is daily growing me.

The things I write are how I am finding joy in the place God has me. It is looking for the silver lining. I have to work hard for that. I am critical, and pessimistic by nature. Not happy go lucky.

I don't write about the hard things while I'm in them because I want to learn from them, not just be complaining. And I don't want to hurt others by what I'm saying, even if they are hurting me.

So, I filter, but I try to be genuine too. Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?

I pray you will continue on this journey with me. And that my writings will encourage your hearts.

Because THAT is the bottom line desire of my heart. Its why I write-day in, day out.