You all know exactly what I mean. These are the shindigs that Pinterest has propagated. Perfectly coordinated games, decorations, table settings, party favors, crafts, and cakes. If that is your thing-more power to you!
But, it is not mine.
I am a fuss free person. So fuss-free I didn't even do much in the way of decorating or flowers for my wedding. We had our bouquets, some balloons and mirrors, and that was about it. It is not a big deal for me. It doesn't interest me. A perfectly decorated and coordinated party is not what I want to spend my time and resources on. I'd rather make a good cake. Not a decorated cake, just a delicious one. ('cause I don't do cake decorating either=))
This is right in my face this week, because the "twins'" birthdays are coming up in less than two weeks. And, my mom (the original hippie), has decided that she wants to be here for their first birthdays. She is driving from TX to VA, and then to MI, in order to do this. And I want to tell her, "why bother?"
Because, frankly, I'm not (bothering). I have never thrown any of my kids a big birthday party. I usually have my bro and his family from across the street come for cake and ice-cream, if it works with both our schedules. I have occasionally had a few cousins over, but it is never a big deal. No games, favors, or crafts.
This is my personal opinion, mind you, and my personality. But, who in their right mind would have tons of kids over? For a perfectly coordinated party that the kids really could care less about? To bring gifts for the birthday child who then wants to play with said gifts, and not to share said gifts. Which paints them in the worst selfish light possible. Lose-lose situation. Crying kids, mess everywhere. No thank you!
Okay, that may be a worse case scenario, but you have to admit, you've seen it happen. Why would that be fun for anyone?
|LC-last year's cake|
I am so "down playing" about birthdays, that I have even missed a few. (and my kids have lived to tell about it-though they may need therapy when adults.) I was in England for Freckles' 5th birthday. We had his party before we left him at grandma's house. And he was okay with that. He got to hang out in Cowtown and go to Sonic. For BMV's 4th birthday I was traveling back from a week of volunteer work in TX. We celebrated the next day. For BMV's 5th birthday I had grand plans for making up missing his 4th birthday. I had a baby due on his birthday. What better gift than a new sib? I also figured that since BMV and Freckles were a few days overdue, I'd be in my nesting stage, and be able to do a nice party for him-complete with grandma's presence. Except, LC came two days early-not late which made me a hormonally whacked mom on BMV's birthday. There I am, 2 days postpartum, determined that I was going to make BMV's cake this year. No one was going to buy him a cake. I was crying and feeling like an awful mom. Because I couldn't on so many fronts. Btw, my mom ended up frosting the cake. Moms are truly great. And all this isn't to say that I don't love or appreciate my mom. Cakes for BMV has just been an all around disaster actually. For his first birthday we were up at camp. I decided to make him a cheesecake for his birthday...but someone had dumped salt in the sugar. Needless to say, that was memorable-and not in a good way.
|BMV-9-icecream cake-a success actually|
|Freckles's spice cake this year|
Meres birthday this year-her first birthday-falls in the middle of the busiest week of my summer. It is the week of the morning and evening VBS's. Obviously a birthday is important, but a one year old doesn't care if it is celebrated on Wednesday (the birthday) or the next Saturday. But, my mom coming in makes me feel like I really shouldn't be putting off this so important occasion. Because she is here for the birthday, and has made it such a priority, why am not I, the mother, making it a priority too?
Are you getting the picture?
Guilt and a desire to please everyone is weighing me down. Even though I have never done a first birthday party for any one of my kids.
Why should I feel the burden this year-especially when I am double and triple parked?
|She will be happy just so long as she can dig into cake at some point in time.|